Ah, fall. That time of year when temperatures cool, leaves change color, new members join our Fraternity, and the bonds of brotherhood grow while celebrating or commiserating over our favorite football teams. (No, despite the performance of my two alma maters, this will not be a diatribe about college football!)
Autumn is always an exciting time on college campuses, watching students return, new students starting their own collegiate careers, and many unaffiliated members investigating whether fraternity life is right for them. As an advisor I relish the opportunity to showcase our organization to prospective members, hoping our values will align with their own strengths, helping the Fraternity to grow even stronger. The one thing that constantly negates our advancement is the lingering threat of hazing.
Advisors, staff members, and senior chapter leaders can (and should) do everything within their means to challenge the culture of hazing when it exists within the chapter. But what can we do about the messages that come from all around us, even from those very football teams we gather to watch together?
It’s always been interesting to me that, at the very same time that movements like National Hazing Prevention Week, online anti-hazing campaigns like #40Answers, and efforts from Fraternity Headquarters, do their best to educate fraternity and sorority members on the dangers and consequences of hazing, football teams do their best to demonstrate that “it’s not so bad” and “everyone goes through it.”
I listen to Mike and Mike on ESPN on the way to work most days, so I was challenged when I heard both of them defending what they referred to as "innocent" hazing activities like head shaving and carrying pads. They even went so far as to argue that at least what occurs in training camp is tame in comparison to what happens at a fraternity, citing a difference between "dangerous" hazing that involves alcohol or other health risks, and the rites of passage that football rookies need to navigate. Not surprisingly, Mike and Mike aren’t alone in making this distinction. Jason Garrett, coach of the Dallas Cowboys, purports to be in favor of banning activities, yet he instituted a policy that rookies would not wear the iconic Dallas star on their helmets until they had “earned the privilege.” (You can read more here).
Let’s apply that doublespeak to our chapters: a fraternity man sees professional athletes do this, and now thinks it's okay to prevent another student from wearing their chapter's letters until they've earned it. Then they can't do anything else until they clean up my room and do my laundry, and they can't use the front door of the house until they've earned that right too. It's not long before all of that "innocent" hazing turns into the dangerous stuff that injures or, at its ugliest manifestation, kills people, because many college students don't see a difference, and they don't draw that line.
There’s an emerging concept in hazing research called “hidden harm.” Simply put, new member educators, recruitment chairs, or the lone upperclassman with an agenda, can’t possibly know what set of experiences a new member brings with him to the new member process. What might seem like innocuous education may result in a traumatic experience for the new member. An example from the NFL again demonstrates this nuance.
I follow Mark Herzlich on Twitter, and all you need to know about him is outlined in his short but poignant bio: Cancer Survivor / New York Giant #58/ BC Alum. What makes Mark’s story stand out is that not only did he conquer Ewing’s Sarcoma, he returned to the line-up a year after treatment, and has gone on to earn a spot on the New York Giants’ roster. Surely a man of his accomplishment and fortitude would not need to pass a rite of indoctrination to prove his worth to his organization. It was heartbreaking for me to see these two pictures posted within weeks of one another by the official Twitter Feed of the New York Giants. Here’s Mark on August 12 boarding the plane for his debut as a member of the Giants’ pre-season squad. Here’s Mark on August 23, the night he intercepted a pass during pre-season play. One notable change between the two pictures is Mark’s haircut. Some of you may look at this and say that this proves the point that an innocent tradition like head shaving has no ill effect on the victim. After all, Mark plays professional football and remains a proud loudspeaker for cancer awareness. But part of me wonders whether he endured flashbacks to his chemotherapy treatments, the cause of his hair loss not more than a few years ago. I can’t presume to know whether his post-interception hair style was self-imposed or done at the hands of his teammates. I do know there are brothers and sisters among us who have lived through similar personal traumas and don’t have the strength of a professional linebacker to move on from it.
I was hazed in college, and not one conversation about it goes by without me reliving that humiliation in my mind. Then a wave of regret hits when I think about the people I hazed after me; I wasn't strong enough to break the cycle. That may be why I work so hard now to help others when they see what’s wrong but don’t know how to fix it.
Many of your chapters are nearing the end of the 8-week new member process. A profound experience awaits those youngest of Delts as they prepare to see and live their Ritual. As the temptation to create false rites of passage increases, member educators, presidents, and even Joe Delt, all have a responsibility to stand up against hazing, even in its seemingly innocent forms. Seek out resources like the Association of Fraternal Leadership and Values, draw inspiration from NIC President and CEO Pete Smithhisler’s Call to Action, or seek out responses to what brothers might say to justify their hazing behavior in the #40Answers compilation. Each of you has the Power to stand up against hazing. I wish you well in having the Courage to do so.
It’s great to be a Delt,
--Jeff Pelletier
Jeff Pelletier is a 1994 graduate of Boston College, and a 2006 Initiate of the Beta Phi chapter at Ohio State University, where he currently serves as the chapter advisor. He works for the university on the staff of the Ohio Union, managing budgets and operations for the student organization community. You can follow him on Twitter @JeffBC94
Impressive blog! -Arron
Posted by: rc helicopter | December 21, 2011 at 05:17 AM